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The Wacky World of Will

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just for the sake of writing Feb. 15th, 2005 @ 01:02 am
Sometimes, you just have to write. Right? It's late, and I cannot sleep. I've tried everything that I normally do, minus the late-night runs to the gym, to deal with my insomnia. However, nothing seems to help. So, here I am. What to say? I think that George R. R. Martin is a genius. Those who have not read any of his books, shame on you. I would suggest starting with A Game of Thrones; try it, I dare you and see if you don't get hooked on the series. Next thing that you know, you'll be waiting, much like myself, for the last book of the series. Of course, this assumes that you like sci-fi/fantasy. If you do not, you may be safe.

I have also been reading a lot of C.S. Lewis in my free time, like I truly have any free time. I have started to re-invest myself into religion, focusing on Christianity, and C.S. Lewis has offered me at least a jumping-off point for my endeavors.

What else? Teaching is hard, and the waiters and waitresses that serve the cocktails that I make seem to be getting younger and younger.
Current Mood: awake

You know that you are a loser when... Nov. 1st, 2004 @ 12:29 am
So it's Halloween. I am really fond of this holiday. I like it as a perfect segue into the holiday season, and I also like it for its own sake. There is something really neat about dressing up in spooky attire, sitting in front of your house and giving candy to kids. It's so pure. I was especially pumped this year because of my new house. In fact, I was so ready for the experience that I even went to extremes by spending way too much on a Jason outfit that came complete with a glow in the dark machete and mask. I planned to sit outside of my drive way (that's right, mine, as in I own it) and pass candy out to prospective trick-or-treaters. However, nobody came to my door. How crappy is that? All that hype and not one kid. I partially blame the neighbors in my court. Kids have long memories when it comes to candy, and I think that my neighbors set a precedent of non-compliance regarding Halloween rituals. I am actually so pathetic that I walked up the street to hand candy out to kids (it was either that or eat it myself). Can you even imagine a stranger dressed as Jason trying desperately to hand you candy? I'm sure that I hit a new low.

what the hell happened to chatting? Oct. 5th, 2004 @ 02:30 am
Mere hours after I graduated from highschool, roughly a million years ago, I attached myself to my Uncle's computer in hopes of communicating with other people who hopefully felt the same emotions that I felt at the time. It was easy. I simply logged on to some site and started talking with people. Granted, all of the people who claimed to be girls between the ages of 18-21 could have very well been middle-aged men, but the point is that it was easy and fulfilling. I don't know if it's my mid 20's angst, or the 5 shots of vodka that I've had this evening, but I tried to communicate via the same chat sites. The result can be summarized in a single question: what happened? The chat rooms that I knew were cyber places where you could slip into conversations that never ended and discuss things that never mattered under a ruse that, to you at least, were neat. This evening I tried to slip into a few different chat rooms, only to exit because I do not have voice technology or I did not want to converse with bots advertising sex websites. So, in a phrase, what the hell happened? I do not know what is worse: getting to the point where you to turn to a computer chat room for human interaction in a moment of intoxicated human vulnerability, or not being able to find any quality human interaction in a chat room

What to do Aug. 31st, 2004 @ 10:13 pm
So I am giving serious thought to becoming a teacher. I don't know...it's a job that I can do while I am completing my master's or JD (God willing). I can make as much money as working at Joe's, and use my degree at the same time. This is in addition to the lofty goal of helping educate people. All that I know is that if I work at Joe's for too long, I may end up strangling someone with a bib.

Sacramento Aug. 30th, 2004 @ 11:53 pm
Well, a few updates since I last wrote in my journal. I no longer live in Tempe, but rather live in Sacramento with my wife, Sharon. Oh yeah, I obviously got married. In all honesty, marriage is a wonderful thing. Sharon and I are dirt poor (holler if you hear me), so the biggest obstacles that we face here in Sacramento consist of entertaining ourselves in the midst of frequent boredom, and each of us trying desperately not to get on eachother's nerves (since neither of us know anyone else around here). I am back to working for Joe's Crabshack, wondering why I didn't commit more time to degree-programs that render me easily employable upon graduation. Well, that is not completely true. I know that my degrees closely align with what inspires and interests me, but it is just hard to take the idealistic approach when you are 25, educated, and doing exactly what you were doing when you were 19 and just discovering the infamous beer bong.

However, at the end of all of my griping I am truly thankful. Granted, some of life's lessons have been hard on me - crow's feet do not wait for 30, and hair is not a right but a priviledge - and luckily I work with a waitstaff that is on average 2-4 yrs my junior, providing me with constant reminders of the aging process. However, it is all good. For those who live in Tempe, out here in Sacramento there are all of these...what are they called...oh yeah, trees. Sharon and I live close to a river, providing for excellent fishing camping opportunities. Also, being up here and not knowing anyone forces Sharon and I to focus on each other...and read more.

So, what else have I learned? When painting a house (which Sharon and I spent the better part of two weeks doing), prep work is 70% of the battle. When undertaking a huge project, like Sharon and I did, give up on any hopes of getting all of the paint or TSP out of your hair or out from under your nails. Most important, however, is that you find really good cd's, because radio stations play the same 10 songs over and over, and 13 hours of listening to basically the same songs will make anyone go out into the middle of the street and shoot their radio.
Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
Other entries
» Ah, the inevitable shoulda woulda coulda
I don't fear death. It doesn't scare me even a little bit. I've seen it's multiple faces and reacted with little more than a shrug. In fact, there is little in this world that scares me. Snakes, yes. Lizards, maybe a little bit. In fact, there is only one thing that truly scares me, and that is regret. I've lived my life fast and loose in hopes of experiencing everything. My one mission has been to converse with everyone else on that train around purgatory and honestly say, "yeah, I've done that. Liked it/ didn't like it, but I've done it." There is a part of me that always wants to grab life by the tail end and ride it through the ethers of time and space, drinking up good and bad experiences like a frat boy. It's funny how that type of mentality can change when you dedicate your life to someone. I bring this up because today I ran into someone whom I knew when I first started college. He and I set out to change the world. We declared ourselves Poli Sci majors the same semester, hoping to follow in Bill Clinton's footsteps (sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky discluded). First we would get our BS degrees, then attend Law School, and then enter the political arena through any means necessary. Well, we both got the BS degrees. He graduated WAY before I, but I teamed my degree with a BS in History. The result: he went on to Law School and has since graduated, and I am trying to juggle a wedding, a mortgage, and some semblance of understanding as to what the next step in my life will be. The wacky, live-for-the-moment William seems to have disappeared (he told me so himself) and has been replaced by something that he barely recognizes. In some ways it may be better as I do not drink as much, but at the same time I seem to have misplaced that passion and drive that truly made me, at one time, interesting. I fear the consequences of my decisions because I fear that I may be unable to juggle life as a husband and still hold to my goals that I once held so dear. Granted, I live a healthier life now, but if there was only a way to balance the two... If anything else, I would like to get back on to the road to success b/c I know that I can take my friend. I am smarter:) (J/K if you ever read this)
» Easy like Sunday Morning
This is what I've needed for a while. Sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in all the craziness of life that you forget the small things, which ironically tend to be the things that make you most happy. For those who do not know, I am getting married on July 3rd and moving up to Sacramento. I mention this only because these two parts of my life, the wedding and the move, account for the vast majority of the stress in my life. However, today I'm really relaxed and loving life. I'm playing guitar, "Someday" by Nickelback, while at the same time watching the History channel and emailing friends. Hell, I may even go see a movie. By the way, for those who have not seen it, I highly suggest Shrek. Antonio Banderas is funnier than hell.
» Personification of Freedom
Today a friend of mine and I went to Pat Tillman's memorial service. We sat on the field at Sun Devil Stadium while planes flew overhead in missing pilot formation. Gov. Napolitano spoke, as well as the current president of ASU. Coaches McGinnis and Snyder returned long enough to give moving testimonies. As I sat there on the field, listening to a laundry list of who's who recount their various stories, I thought 2 different things. First, I couldn't help reflecting upon a toast given by a good friend and former Army Ranger who said of Pat Tillman, "Why couldn't he just come back safe and have the great life that he deserved?" Though I did not personally know Tillman, I count myself as one of a large group of people who waited with anxiious anticipation for the opportunity to welcome him home, thank him for standing out from the rest of the world by taking the selfless and true approach to life, ...and elect him to any office that his heart desired. Second, I reflected on what selfless sacrifices that I have made, or more truthfully have not made, in my own life. I believe that Tillman's short life provides a lesson to all of us of the necessity to recognize our moral culpability in the formation of the world around us, and our responsibility to sacrifice, on some level, for it. Tillman, who graduated Suma Cum Laude from ASU's business school the same semester that he was voted PAC 10 Defensive player of the year, walked away from a multi-million dollar contract in professional football to do what? To serve his country. He chose to separate himself from the rest of us who stared dumb-foundedly and angrily shook fists at television accounts of burning buildings and rising death tolls, only to go about our lives as if nothing else happened. Whether or not one agrees with the choice of response, everyone must honor and respect his ability to be true to himself and follow his heart, irregardless of the financial and conventional concerns that held the rest of us back. That, folks, is a sense of freedom and self-understanding that few of us can ever experience.
» 2 days down, 20 lbs to go
So I've joined the masses and started the South Beach Diet. Why? Because I want to lose 20 lbs by my wedding. This is not to say that I am fat, because I'm not. Rather, I prefer pleasantly plump. Evidently, the first few days are the worst, and I think that I have to agree. Without the mass carbs that I normally consume I am having the hardest time making my body think that it is full. I am actually eating more than I usually do, but without the really heavy "bad" carbs that I normally abuse, the diet feels more like punishment than anything else. However, I've been here before and I know that it gets better. The good news is that I am lifting regularly again (I started a couple of weeks before my diet) and I am starting to see some of the definition of old. So, it all hurts and sucks, but I am determined to stick it through.
» If only Moses lived in my apartment complex
So I am currently living in the middle of a swamp. All I really need now are some animals indigenous to swampy environments. What do I mean? Well, I got off of work at about 10:00 PM and headed to the bar with a bunch of my buddies, where we toasted the 10 to 1 butt kicking that the Diamondbacks served up the Cubs. I should have known something big was going to happen as my whole day seemed to be a crescendo to some unknown yet inevitably unpleasant event. I stayed at the bar until closing time (which is 1:00 am in Arizona) and then headed home with my woman. What greeted me? Let me tell you that I do not exaggerate when I say that water literally leaked out my front door. Alarmed, I entered my apartment to find my carpet soaked through and water inches deep in my kitchen and bathroom. Evidently, someone (probably one of my friends) used my bathroom before we left for the bar, and clogged it to the point of overflowing. Luckily, we left before this could be caught, so the water was free to run amuck and unmolested for the better part of three hours. Yeah, get a visual of what you THINK it looks like in my apartment right now, and multiply it by, oh, say.... a hundred. I've been at it for the better part of 3+ hours, trying desperately to suck up the water with a wet vac and carpet shampooer (much to my neighbors' pleasure I am sure), and I would be flattering myself to say that I have even put a dent in the mess. I have calculated (by the number of times that I have dumped the 16 gallon drum attached to the wet vac) that I have dumped over 70 gallons of water onto my front porch. The only way that this could be worse is if I was forced to listen to that damn Asian American Idol reject do his god-awful rendition of "She Bangs" during my futile struggle with Lake Mead.
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